It's funny how people who you thought were friends so quickly become acquaintances and sometimes vice versa.
I'm not a nerd, I'm a geek => I do have some sociable knowledge/skills. But sometimes I wonder if I wear my friendships out sometimes?
So far in my life, it's always me that has to reinforce friendships, me that feels a need to continue them instead of letting them stagnate and become stale. Why?
- Is it normal to have friends who you lose touch with?
- Is it normal to have friends who you know very little about?
Lately I've become wary of wearing out my new friendships, wanting to meet too often, (selfishly?) wanting to be around others for company and to feel alive. Is it wrong that I want to know more about the amazing people around me, to feel like these could be the lasting friendships....friendships that really matter? And that it's not a convenience relationship for the other party as I often wonder about some of my "friendships" and acquaintances.
I know I'm a geek, good with anything technological, good with computers and the like and sometimes I feel like a means to an end for others.
That's how I feel about my little brother sometimes; he only really gets in touch when he needs my help, he doesn't really ask me how I am or how things are going. Which makes me wonder if this is my life - people know I'm good at x so only really get in touch when they know I can help, otherwise they're quite happy in their own bubble without me.
I'm going to stop now as I seem to be having lots of questions and doubts in my mind. gggrrr