Puzzled by people

Love is the answer.

I'm pretty good at puzzles but puzzled by people
And I don't trouble trouble and trouble don't trouble me.
Stare at the paper, fold it in two
Facing the walls are the soles of my shoes.

Sometimes you have to find out for yourself.
Sometimes you need to be told.
Sometimes you never find the answer.
So the story goes.

We never had a crossword
My words got lost and you never heard
I'm 2 down you're one across the room
Beginning with I and ending in U
Beginning in my eye and ending as an X
Leaves a bad taste in my mouth
To think of you again like the bad taste leaking from the ink in my pen
Doodle at the side as I do to in life
Choosing to lose time instead of doing what I like
Starts off black and white and lacking in life
Until pen in blue lends it a hue.

Puzzled by people
Loving isn't easy
You can't google the solutions to people's feelings

Sometimes you have to find out for yourself.
Sometimes you need to be told.
Sometimes you never find the answer.
So the story goes.

Chewing on the pen
2 down again
Not enough letters for the clue in my head
Lost in thought, never been there before
With the turn of a pun on the tip of my tongue
The freshest memory will fail to recall
As well as the messiest, faded scrawl

I'm puzzled by people
Loving isn't easy
You can't google the solutions to people's feelings

Sometimes you have to find out for yourself.
Sometimes you need to be told.
Sometimes you never find the answer.
So the story goes.

Love is the answer.

I'm puzzled by people
Loving isn't easy
You can't google the solutions to people's feelings

Sometimes you have to find out for yourself.
Sometimes you need to be told.
Sometimes you never find the answer.
So the story goes.

Love is the answer.

A different start to my blog today.

This song+lyrics pretty much are where I'm at today, and possibly for a while I'm not sure.

You see, I don't see myself as socially inept, but I'm having major troubles reading people at the moment. Is it me or my state of mind, or the complete lack of social interaction I've suffered since losing my job?

Had a really nice drink with Chantelle last night and well, some things she said in a friendly way I mistook for something else. my bad :(

It's like sometimes I don't know if people are being my friend because they value me as a friend or feel sorry for me. It's really wierd being inside me and looking out, always wary about what's going on around me, how people are around me.

Maybe I should just rent a cave in the Peaks and become a hermit when Ollie isn't around. I don't think I'm too bad when Ollie is around because he does make me feel alive and happy (when he's not being mr grumpy, which makes me sad)

For all the insights depression has given me into my emotions, I wonder whether it's stripped me what I knew about people so that I have to somehow start to learn again.

I just feel so emotionally tired and want to give up. I've hardly been awake today, this is how my body (or brain) copes with it - it shuts off, sometimes quite literally.

I wish I could google the answers or find some help or something.

I wanted to write more, but even just thinking about the words are emotionally tiring me out. Is it just me or do others with anxiety and/or depression go through this. Might have to have a nap to get rid of this feeling :(